In the land of topsy-turvy....

When kilometers become miles,
Kilograms become pounds,
gms becomes ounce,
Litres become gallons,
220V becomes 110V,
Switching on becomes switching off,
Left driving becomes right,
Ground floor becomes first floor,
and lots and lots more….

That’s when you realize that you are in the land of topsy-turvy , the land that has stubbornly sworn to baffle the minds of confused people like me. Oh yeah! you got me right folks! I am indeed talking about the United states of America. Although I have been in the US before, each time I come back, every time my head spins in volleys. It does take at least 2-3 weeks for me to get adjusted here. My chaotic and befuddled mind has to remember so many things, be responsible for so many things and get accustomed to the enormous changes without any friends/family around.
It has almost become customary that wherever I go, I always do something weird or funny and end up getting myself embarrassed. I am now just so used to getting embarrassed, I should say.. . Common guys! Don’t laugh at me. Have mercy! That’s how I am made!!. Every time these things seem to happen, an inner voice yells from inside..”Welcome lady…you are in America! ”. I have been here for a week and a half and I have almost heard atleast 100 “welcome lady…” voices now…….lol…:D.
When I landed in the US and reached my hotel, the front desk person , a petite Mexican lady, greeted me warmly and ushered me to the left alley of the hotel and told me in her adorable Spanish-splotched english that I was to occupy the first room on the left in the first floor. I thanked her politely, lunged my heavy luggage cart forward and walked along valiantly. Since, even after walking the entire alley, I couldn’t find an elevator, I turned around and walked back the way and gave the lady a bemused look . She gave me an equally bemused look. Right at that moment, a ‘welcome lady..” voice banged from inside. “oh god!!” I then realized I was already in the first floor(ground floor of our world ). What should I do now?? …well give her a self-conscious smile and get going as though nothing had happened. Hahah :D. ...

Ok...Lets come to the next one.This time I had to re-activate my bank account , coz my previous one had been closed due to inactivity for a long time.I reached the bank by 4:05 PM but unfortunately , the note in the entrance read
“Working Hours – Lobby : 9:00 A.M to 4:00 P.M (4:00 P.M? man!! I wish I worked in a bank in a US)
Drive thru : 9:00 A.M to 5:00 P.M
Obviously,I had to take the drive thru option but then what the hell was it?? (though the name ‘drive thru’ did give some insight, I really dint know what to expect of it). Maintaining a confident exterior, (as usual :D) I asked my cabbie to proceed to the ‘drive thru’. Two bank employees sat inside the bank and faced the customers behind a glass counter. They spoke in a mike so that people outside could hear. We parked at about 50 m away but there seemed to be no mike for me to speak. ‘oh god! Please save me..” , I prayed fervently and went ahead with my query (hoping that these guys would hear me..). In a moment came the reply but then she was asking me for my debit card in order to re-activate it. “but, man!!..There was no opening in the counter “ and more so, we were 50 m away. I was back in square one. My cabbie came to the rescue this time."god bless him.” He picked up a container that was nearby , put my debit card in it , placed it in a stand. As soon as he placed it, “whoosh…….!” It flew away like a rocket and” bang!” , the girl inside got my debit card. She examined it and asked me to come back again when their lobby was open. By this time my inner voice came back again. This time the volume seemed so deafening..lol :D
“So much for a Drive thru!” I muttered to myself and came back home. When I closed my eyes to sleep that night, the voice came back.This time it said, “Good night..sleep tight”. My My…I was relieved and dozed off, lest I encounter something else.

P:S : The mexican lady I was talking about looked like a college kid but she said she was 24.she had a 3 year old kid and was never married before!…wow…..well… "Welcome to America indeed "

What's up next?

It was a rainy night and I sat gazing out of my window, pondering on what to write for my next post. Bent upon muddling up my thought process, a gang of boisterous mosquitoes kept buzzing around me in circles and assaulting my whole body at their own will. It seemed as though that there was an entire annoying family that was synergizing on capitulating my patience.

The notorious family was a stickler of perseverance. One by one , mother, father, son, daughter, granma, granpa, uncle and god knows whoever ,went on to churn out a volley of bites across the entire cross section of my body, and making me go all “Aw..Ouch..eek..oo..ehh”. Trying to concentrate on the task at hand, I ignored them for a while. But then it never seemed to end.After being patient for about 15 minutes,That was it. I decided. The protagonist inside me sprang to life and I decided to teach these annoying creatures a lesson. “uh..oh”, Ironically, they had indeed succeeded in breaching my rock-solid patience(Or was it? ).Jumping up and down ineptly, I started squatting them fervently, with my bare hands one by one. I must have looked like a clumsy kolattam dancer, I guess .

Each mosquito I killed, seemed to heighten my pleasure and the sadist within me started dancing away to glory. Thoughts about the post , took the back seat and gradually started waning away. After ten grueling minutes, I was about to celebrate my silver jubilee mosquito when ”Pop! went the 50th mosquito and Pop! Came an idea for my post!”. “Oh..my..gawd! ha….ah..ahah. I got an idea finally!”, I broke loose like the annoying Janus in Friends. It’s definitely a bizarre case. I decided. How could someone strike up an idea when involved in something as brutally moronic and loony as this? Well, Whatever man! End of the day, an idea is an idea. I got the idea that’s it! ”yipeee..yipeee…whoaaaaaaaa”, I rolled away merrily.

If you people are poking your heads on what great idea I could have got, Let me tell you guys its nothing so great! nothing great at all.But then its an idea anyway. Again…an idea is an idea? Right?…”heheheheh….:):)…hohohho..;-) ”. Before anybody of you can whack me black and blue, let me tell you about it right away.
I am going to do a wild life series with a slight difference. In this, I would be touching upon the lives of quite a few wild species of the world. As customary, In the beginning would be giving basic details such as physical features, habitat, food habits, life span and social structure of the species. But then that’s not it. Since , my highpoint is always fiction, I wanted to experiment a new genre(to me its new) of blending fiction with the facts.

So , in each of these series, I am going to try and Invent a short story based on the species under discussion. The facts would be listed down in the beginning of the story and then the story would follow. I will try to make it as brief as possible. Let me just say that it is going to be 70% fiction and 30% facts.
Before I say bye, Let me leave an obvious clue on what species I would be taking up first.

Clue : Have you guys seen the famous animated movie, Madagascar ?(yes! You guessed it right!)

I would be posting the first one shortly……..:-). Bye till then .

Karan's useless antics

Tried my hand at a short story…Here we go..
Karan was immensely concentrating on the task at hand. His eyeballs were focused, his fingers were still, body stooped forward and ready to charge. He was all set for the next attempt. His mission was to maneuver his science textbook to spin on a vertical axis, with his index finger as the hub. The first, second and third attempts had been big letdowns, because he couldn’t even balance the book. It kept toppling over and over again. The fourth one seemed ok and the fifth was even better and now he was going strong on the sixth, determined to get it right this time. For a nine year-old kid, his determination and commitment were amazing.
Right since he had visited Ramu Anna’s house during his summer vacation, Karan had got hooked on to this notebook stunt. Ramu, Karan’s cousin was extremely good at ‘sleight of the hand’ kind of tricks. As a matter of fact, his hands never were still and he always kept spinning, swinging or twirling something or the other with both his hands. In one such occasion, Karan had caught him spinning a book with just his index finger. He had done it in ease and in absolute style. ”Wow! That’s so cool. I want to learn it too. It would be really good to show it off to my friends Badri and Sudha. They will simply be aahstruck!”, he thought. At that moment he resolved to learn the knack of the Book spin and show it off to his friends.
Immediately his juvenile mind started reasoning with the target at hand. If he were to learn it, he concluded that he just had two solutions, 1) The quicker way-learn from Ramu Anna 2) Practice and learn all by himself. Out of the two, the first option seemed to hurt his ego(Ego can start from an early age , u know ), so he settled for the second option and decided to practice everyday. Since he was very bad with English, he initially thought he could carry out his practice during his English classes. But then in the end he ruled this out because Ms Treesa, his English teacher, was so very sweet in pite of his poor english scores. Next on his list was science . Although Karan liked biology, the manner in which his teacher Ms. Raheja taught the subject, made most of his classmates to eventually detest the subject. She could make even the most interesting concepts sound so prosaic. To make matters worse, she also happened to be a very stern disciplinarian. And hence, Karan’s next unanimous choice for practice was science class.
His strategy for not getting caught was very simple and ingenious. Every science class he would sit behind big Bubli and perform his book spins. She was so huge that nobody could see past her. Not even the razor-sharp eyes of Ms Raheja. Unfortunately for him, many others in his class were using this novel approach for their own motives and he would be contending with veteran pranksters like, Munna, Arjun, Shiva & Pallavi for the coveted seat. He had to be alert every time. ”God! It will be tough. But then mom said good things will happen to good people.(she had actually meant pupil ) So I have a chance.” , he thought.
All set for the operation, he had been successful in dodging Ms Raheja for the past five days. Five days meant five classes, which was equal to 45 x 5 = 225 minutes of practice. So far so good. But then today had been an unlucky day. At 11:30 A.M, when the science class was about to commence, he went and sat behind Bubli. In about two minutes, Arjun and Shiva came to his seat and demanded him to get up. When Karan refused, together ,both of them knocked him off and occupied their seat.Although Karan felt a sense of revenge rising from beneath, he regained his composure immediately. ”Hey ! Idiots! just wait till you see what I have to show. Just wait for a few more weeks. I will be the hero.”, he resolved. He then moved to another relatively safe position and resumed his practice. He had already completed five attempts and was going strong on the sixth attempt. Just as he picked his textbook for the sixth round, the keen eyes of Ms.Raheja settled on him. He was caught red-handed. “Karan! Karan! This is absolutely atrocious! What are you up to? How can you involve yourself in such useless antics? Are you some kind of a juggler? I thought you were a sensible kid. My god! Its appalling! Now, get out of my class with your pen and notebook. You will listen from outside and answer my questions in the end. Ok? Out you go!”, she berated at the top her voice.
Karan was more surprised and puzzled than angry at what she had said. “Bubli why weren’t you there to save me? Anyways, What did Ms Raheja mean by atrocious, appalling, antics, juggler? How can she remember so many words? She is not even an English teacher. Huh! Whatever. But then she described my book spin activity as useless! How could that be? How can such a fabulous and heroic thing be termed as useless? , Maybe she doesn’t know anything. She is the onw who is atrocious, appalling, antics, juggler. Not me.” he concluded.
For the next half hour he had no alternative but to listen to Ms Atrocious. She was teaching something about Darwin’s theory. ”For any organism in this world, including human beings, three basic things are required to survive in this world. Food, shelter and sleep. Without these nobody can survive. Now I’ll delve deep into one of Darwin’s postulates – ‘survival of the fittest’”, she said. That was the last Karan heard of her. He then drifted into his own world only to be brought back at the sound of the lunch bell. Luckily for him, Ms Raheja forgot all about asking questions and just went her own way.” Probably she was hungry. Good for me.”, he thought.
Later, he goobled down his lunch and dashed to the playground with Badri to play football. Badri was also the same age as Karan but belonged to a different section. So on their way to the ground, Karan started narrating the day’s incidents to him. “Badri, you know what? Ms. Raheja said that without food, shelter and sleep, nobody could exist in this world. But then she is totally wrong. When my father goes inside his study with his laptop, sometimes he never sleeps or eats for 2-3 days. Even if my mom offers him food, he simply yells at her and asks her not to disturb him. Ms. Raheja is not aware even of such simple things. She is atrocious and just fit to teach useless antics. My god! She is so appalling juggler! Don’t you think?” , he blurted.
“Yes Karan. You are right! She is so atrocious and knows nothing”, Badri replied. But then Badri was actually thinking, ”What did he mean by all that? Atrocious, antics…lot more right? Where did he learn so much English? Wow…he is so great”, he thought.Apparently,Karan’s objective to show off in front of Badri had finally materialized. Maybe not for what he had planned.

Dont Follow Pied Piper

I asked myself this question, when I was 16 years old (I am still 16 ;-),U know), What do I want to become in Life?
The answers came immediately flowing to me all at once. I wanted to become a biologist, a musician or a writer. This may sound absurd to the reader, because none of the three fields are related. But then these were the things that liked doing, rather enjoyed doing and things in which I knew I would shine. You could either call it the sublime confidence of the youth or whatever but I clearly knew what I wanted. My dream was alive and kicking, clear and intact.

When we move forward by 7 years and peep into my life and see what had happened of me, it turned out to be that I became a software engineer. Not a biologist, not a musician, not a writer. But Why?? Why I am not living my dream? Why I am sitting in front of the monitor and scratching my head, when my entire system is screaming against me to get out from here? Why am I not doing what I was meant to do?

When I tried to answer the unending Why’s that crept up, there were quite a few answers. One of the obvious reasons, of course, was because a software job is lucrative. IT Pays, u know. Many thousands are lured into the IT Maze because of the money tag attached to it. No doubt, IT definitely pays better than many other sectors. When financial liabilities and family commitments loom like a specter ahead of us, any person would obviously choose the lucrative offer, instead of going ahead and following their hearts. It was the same with me I guess. I don't really have an answer. I stepped into this career at the cost of all my dreams. At the cost of myself.

If we think of other situations, there are few others for whom working in an IT Company becomes a social status symbol.Anything less than that is not acceptable. The parents drill this thought into their children right from childhood. Getting into a software firm is made their lifetime ambition and anything other than that is taboo. but why?? I can't answer this you know :-).
Finally, there are people whose dream itself was to get into IT. I guess these people,I should say , are the lucky ones.

So What I am trying to say? I am just about to get into it. Am I saying nobody should get into IT? of course not (after all its my bread and butter). I want to insist on the fact that we should do what we are meant to do. If you don’t know yet, slap your head further and think, one day you’ll know it. Your heart will lead you to it. Once you identify your interest, slowly and steadily get out of your current career to your heart’s yearning. When you are being paid for what you enjoy doing, it could be the best thing that can happen to anybody. The amount of satisfaction and happiness that you derive from it would be incredible and unimaginable.

I know this idea may sound a bit too whimsical and totally unrealistic. Its easier said, Than done. I know. But, then Friends, it is very much do-able. With a little bit of grit and determination it can be done. Set up a timeline for yourselves. Try to do away with all your commitments within that stipulated time. It might take years but then in the end,Get free and get going in the road that you refused to take when you were at the crossroads of your life. Let me quote a dialogue from the scent of a woman, here:

“Now I have come to
the crossroads in my life.
I always knew
what the right path was.
Without exception, I knew,
but I never took it.
You know why ?
It was too damn hard.”

Yes, In the beginning I am sure it would be tough, but in the end, you would find something that you have always coveted for. Even if there are thousand people barring you on your journey, in the end they will know that you were right and they were wrong. Again, I want to quote from a tamil movie song,
“Iruttiniley nee nadakkayile un nizhalum unnai vittu vilagi vidum
Nee matum thaan intha ulagathiley unakku thunai endru therinthirukkum”

Take Care of yourself because nobody else knows you better than you. Just be patient till the time comes and do not do something just because everybody else is doing it.
All the rats followed Pied Piper.
What happened to them in the end?
They all drowned in the Weser river.
The rat race has begun already. If you are one of those rats, Hey! Hey! Wake up to reality! Do you want to drown? Its up to each of us to decide.

On your marks, Get set , BLOG!... :-)

Yes.I am in it too :-). Alas!I have started blogging! This is something that i have been aching to do all these days, but then being a typical Libran,I have been too lazy and lethargic to start off.I read atleast 2-3 blog posts a day and have always sworn that I would also create my own soon enough and keep it going. Somehow, it did not happen thus far. But then, lets not delve in History ;-), since I have already created this blog on this wonderful March day. I swear that I would churn out atleast one post a week, from my cranky mind(a blog-post a day is too ambitious for me!). Anything under the moon(just becoz i dint want to use 'anything under the sun' :-)), would be discussed here. Get ready and please keep all your comments coming.
P.S : Hey ppl....Just be Happy whatsoever.At the end of the day, being happy is what matters...